im-training-for-a-feeling-that-i-dont-have-yet/ im-training-for-a-feeling-that-i-dont-have-yet/ SLOGANISING/

### Grammars of citizenship*

Ripped from a moment of urban dissociation, spatial disorientation. I stand on the city corner unable to control a laugh that reaches out from the grief that radiates my whole body. Despite begin late I stop, pause and allow the laughter to resonate into my body out into the streets,

And now I find myself in this scene, black marker pen letters on a perspex protection panel and laughing under a blue sky in a moment of tuning to relief, to a small crevice of possibility, of pure disregard for the policing or moralising of the streets, the institution, the refusal. I make myself vulnerable to this loosening..

The letters are carefully scrawled on the pillar of a municipal building, town hall, records office, civil services, a legislative space deciding who gets to be what in the permitted documents. However here each letter written in a personal font, a proposition in the open to remake the street, the city, the mood.

I'm flooded with a feeling of relief of the thickness of life which pervades this heavy moment, in which the choice between mourning and militancy always seems present and the possibility for them to inhabit together seems impossible despite all the sloganeering of our everyday work. In session A_ had asked what grief was allowing me to orient into, to give permission for a mourning of our inability to really be able affect the material conditions of others. Yet how to remain with this feeling to touch and know life fully.

The flicks up on the bottom of the H, the A, the letters filling the full space of the perspex and perfectly fitting there. Salt exudes from the pillar, drawn out by the warmer air outside than inside of the 18th century stone building. The pillar itself joined to an older wooden door with metal screws and edged with marble. The letters in permanent pen providing a new grammar of the legislative building. The mundane calling of sexual citizenship.

A demand to the me or to the city, a location for it to happen, or already happening here .. an articulation of rebellious fonts,.a call to action for everyone with everyone..

grammarsofcitizenship.md